why?

"why are you getting up so early after staying up so late?" i was asked. oh how i love the way God uses people to show me truth. the question resounded only for a moment in my head before i knew the answer: i am sacrificing sleep because i have a full day ahead of pouring out and i need to be full, full of truth. i need my Perfect Dad to tell me again who i am. i need Him to tell me who He is and that He's got everything in control. i need to be filled with His love, His word, His truth. i need it. i crave it.

thank you, Papa God for leading me, filling me. thanks for telling me again how beautiful i am to You and how precious i am to Your heart. thanks for showing me my value to You. [How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them!] thank You. again and again i will come to You. You are my rock and there is no other.


In God is my salvation and my glory;The rock of my strength, And my refuge, is in God. Psalm 62:7

7.5.11

this song has been running through my head all day. it is my heart's cry.


I will be a fragrant burning 
I’ll wash Your feet with my tears
my love will be a poured out offering to You
a fragrant burning for You


I am weak, but it's glorious because You, Jesus, are oh-so strong!

6.23.11

i said yes when the Lord asked to use me at VBS.

running late this morning, i chose make-up over quiet time with my Perfect Dad.
my girls were a little lot chaotic today. the lesson was about grace and the chosen parable was the story of the prodigal son. frustrations all around me, but i still found joy in loving my 6th grade girls and in communion with Holy Spirit even through the pandemonium.

in our small group time, i presented the gospel and led my eighteen girls in a prayer of repentance to receive God's free gift of grace. i felt like i did it very poorly. i felt like they weren't paying attention. i felt like i'd really messed up. i was incredibly discouraged, so much so that when three girls raised their hands to indicate that they had prayed to accept Jesus as their Savior for the first time, i barely celebrated their new births!

this evening, one of my friends was asking about how VBS went today. i began to tell how the first three days were really good compared to today. i recounted how unfocused small group time was and how i had felt less than prepared. and then, almost in passing, i added, "and three of my girls accepted Jesus..." that's when it hit me! three people received the gift of salvation. heaven is rejoicing! how had it been so easy for the enemy to lie to me and steal my joy?

oh how satan hates it when we do kingdom work! he wants to steal our joy. that's why it's so important to fill ourselves with truth. it's the best way to fight against lies.

i am so thankful for God's kindness in using little, weak, stumbling me. what a blessing! thanks, Papa. You are so full of grace. i love Your grace and Your leadership in my life.